Two aliens landed in an outback desert of Queensland near a petrol station
that was closed for the night.  They approached one of the pumps and the
younger alien addressed it saying, "Greetings, Earthling!  We come in
peace.  Take us  to your leader."

The petrol pump, of course, didn't respond.  The younger alien became angry
at the lack of response and the older alien said, "I'd calm down if I  were
you."

The younger alien ignored the warning and repeated his greeting.  Again,
there was no response.  Annoyed by what he perceived to be the
pump's haughty attitude, he drew his ray gun and said impatiently,
"Greetings,  Earthling.  We come in peace.  Do not ignore us this
way!!!!  Take us to your  leader or I will fire!"

The older alien warned his comrade saying, "You don't want to do that!!!  I
don't think you should make him mad."

"Rubbish," replied the cocky, young alien.  He aimed his weapon at the pump
and opened fire.  There was a huge explosion.  A massive fireball roared
towards them and blew the younger alien off his feet and deposited him in a
burnt, crumpling mess about 200 yards away in a rabbit burrow.

About a half hour passed.  When he finally regained consciousness, he
refocused his three eyes and straightened his bent antenna and looked
dazedly at the older, wiser alien who was standing over him shaking his big,
green head.

"What a ferocious creature!" exclaimed the young, fried alien.  "He damn
near killed me!  How did you know he was so dangerous?"

The older alien leaned over, placed a friendly feeler on his crispy friend
and replied, "If there's one thing I've learned during my intergalactic
travels, you don't want to mess with a guy who can wrap his penis around
himself twice and then stick it in his ear."